The Dalai lama would have said that Crossmaglen got lucky when Pearse Og beat them

While reading a book written by the devout Dalai Lama, it occurred to me that many of his musings could be modified to send out valuable lessons to the various relationships found in sport between say coach and player, coach and coach, player and player, backroom staff and coach or manager, backroom staff and player, committee and coach, coach and manager, medical staff and coach or player, etc.

If you are involved in any of these sporting relationships, then read 18 of the Dalai Lama’s ‘Rules of Living’, which I modify into ‘Rules for Sport’ inspired by the Dalai Lama.

1 – Take into account that great love and achievements involve great risk – Take into account commitment and great achievements, eg, All Ireland titles club or county, English Premiership, European Cups and World Cups in soccer and rugby, etc., involve great risk. Always give it your all, take the risk, just play and go for broke.

2 – When you lose, don’t lose the lesson – No more ‘should have, could have if…’ Realise you just weren’t good enough. Think ‘I can’, live by ‘I don’t lose, either I win or I learn.’

3 – Follow the three ‘Rs’ – Respect for self, respect for others, responsibility for all your actions. Enough said.

4 – Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck – Crossmaglen had won 13 consecutive County titles before Pearse Ogs dethroned them in 2009, complacency maybe, but the next year and since then they have won another seven titles, so not getting that title in 2009 was certainly a stroke of luck.

5 – Learn the rules so you know how to break them properly – In Gaelic sport, and I’m sure in other sports, few coaches/players ever see or are certainly not suppliled with a rule book. They learn their game rules in training but not in ‘full detail’ and that’s why many at games – managers, coaches, fans and players suffer much confusion and rancour over referee’s decisions.

6 – Don’t let a little dispute injure a great friendship – Management and players often have differences of opinion but in resolving them, it should be only by the simple rule – ‘Target the performance, not the person’.

7 – When you realise you’ve made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it – Making mistakes is the bedrock of learning supported by the adage, ‘I never lose, I either win or I learn’. A child learns to walk by ‘baby steps’, ie, he tries, he fails, he tries, he fails again, he tries and ‘nails’ the skill. This is learning by learning to feel the skill and be able to learn or fix it by that feeling.

8 – Spend some time alone every day – Choose a quiet time and reflect positively on training/preparation that day. In time you’ll find you’ve developed character and confidence.

9 – Open your arms to change, but don’t let go of your values – Change can be a four letter word – FEAR. Face it as change is inevitable and don’t let go of your beliefs, purpose, goals or attitude – ie, the values that define you in life.

10 – Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer – After a heavy defeat or if a player makes a bad mistake, say nothing. When they play better or fix their mistake – praise them. Build your players up in public, fix players in private (1 to 1).

11 – Live a good, honourable life – So, in sport, be an exemplary role model sport person. If you are, you’ll find when you get older and think back, you’ll enjoy your career a second time.

12 – A loving atmosphere in your home/team preparation is the foundation of your life/team’s achievements – Strong commitment and inner harmony sustain your team in good times and bad.

13 – In disagreements with loved ones/players, deal only with the current situation – Don’t bring up the past, as the past should already have been dealth with. Don’t stay in the now.

14 – Share your knowledge, it’s a way to achieve immortality – In being remembered long after retirement from your sport, your work will still be appreciated, remembered and used widely, if you shared your thoughts, ideas, notes and practices (either written, spoken or by film/video) with other coaches.

15 – Be gentle with the earth – In a sporting sense, this means don’t cut up/destroy pitches by sprinting on muddy areas, or not spreading the training load over different areas. Pitch protection is as important as environmental protection.

16 – Once a year go some place you’ve never been before – Another country, another sport, different methods. Doing this re-opens your eyes and minds to the creativity that is in us all – especially you.

17 – Remember that the best relationship is one which your love for each other exceeds your need for each others – When a team has a well defined ‘purpose’ and they can say ‘what we do is just us’ that ‘team bond’ is strong because its players ‘just do’ for their team rather than have to look for needs to serve, eg, Crossmaglen, Kilkenny under Cody, Barcelona and New Zealand.

18 – Judge your success by what you had to give up in order to get it – For me, successful players are committed, ie, they give you reasons for everything and they ‘give their all’. I call them ‘C’s Interested players. (I’s) do things when it suits and they will give you excuses for everything. Recreational or ‘pub league players’ (R’s) give neither reasons or excuses and happily use their sport as a pastime.

Hopefully the Dalai Lama has given you some valuable lessons to be better in your sport.